How long does it take to forgive a cheating spouse?
Question by bigboyd65: How long does it take to forgive a cheating spouse?
Best answer:
Answer by kevin b
never have
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You don’t.
never olny scums cheat losers
you can always forgive but you will never forget
I don’t think it’s possible, honestly. A cheater has a glitch that can’t be fixed, IMO.
Unfortunately, probably a lifetime. Hard to let go of the pain of betrayal
it depends if my spouse cheated on me I would no longer be with him. I may one day forgive him but never be back with him.
I have friends where it took a year and some where it has not been forgotten at all
You can try and try. You might be able to forgive but I doubt it. You would be a better person than me. But if you do forgive, you will never forget. I am not even with my husband anymore and we do get along but I still, after 13 years, will never forget. Wish I could because now I have a very hard time trusting any man.
it varies with the pain and suffering they went through … 15 minutes to 15 years or never
oh sweety , you can forgive …you can never forget. you have a long road to follow here if this happened to you. there are no words that i have , that could help you get over this.
once a cheater always a cheater.. just like a thief you can rehabilitate them but they will always go back to stealing… same thing..
move on to someone who loves you and only you and will be 100% faithful to only you!
i think along time but all depends on the person
That depends on the person.
you can forgive, but you will never forget,and you will never trust again.
how ever long it takes to get a divorce finalized
you can forgive the spouse but dont get back with them
never
About 3 million years
The spouse that was cheated on my forgive at any time, but forgiveness dosn’t always equate to wanting to get back together. If I was cheated on I could never be with my husbnad again because it would always be on my mind that he would cheat on me again.
Forgiving is not forgetting ….Its remembering with your mind at peace
deffend on how hurt it is….
most of women would never forgive someone who cheated on them, but also never forgive themselves. they will always think about the reason why a guy to that to them….
did they do some thing to make a guy cheat or have i done something wrong to him?…
that’s the most common question girls have if someone cheated on them
I don’t know if it can ever be forgiven. I do know that I caught my wife at it and we are now involved in a nasty divorce. Once a cheater, never can be trusted again.
The forgiving comes quickly. You made that decision the first time you slept with your wife again after her affair. The FORGETTING is the impossible part.
It takes a few years and I don’t think that the husband ever fully recovers from the betrayal. Try to keep in mind that there were problems in the marriage long before the affair ever took place. While that doesn’t justify the infidelity it will enable you to see what progress you have since made after choosing to forgive.
Don’t bring up the past and make sure that any habits or communications that enabled the affair aren’t part of her life.
You have to start over again building a friendship and let it progress. If you find you truly can’t do this then you are justified in ending the relationship. Good Luck.
My spouse cheated on me. I tried for a year to forgive. I started to. But I could never forget. We got divorced. I couldn’t handle it. He wouldn’t go to counseling. Maybe you and your spouse will. That’s the best thing to do to start the healing process.
I hope it works out.
My ex husband cheated on me and I cannot completely forgive him for it. It’s been almost 4 years now since I found out.
That depends some what on the person, but more so on how often you have reminders of what happened. If you’re able to move on and remove all reminders (such as evidence of how you found out), it’ll be much easier to forgive and keep the forgiveness coming. If you keep the evidence around, you’re bound to come across it again and it’ll bring up the memories of when you first found out and you’re back to square one.
The biggest time variable is of course… it’ll take longer to forgive them if they keep cheating or if you know that they’ll never stop.
It’s easier to forgive if you can keep it out of the front of your mind (that is not the same as forgetting).
Everybody who its happened to has it different. It can be done. Dont let the folks in this forum or anywhere think you cant forgive…you can and will if you want the relationship to work out. Its going to take awhile…a few months to a lifetime. You will determine this…good luck and if you feel youve made the right choices then you have.
It depends on how sincere the cheater is in wanting the forgiveness from you. Also, how much do you really want to forgive them? It takes only the forgiver to forgive but if you are looking for reconciliation it takes both ends to meet in order to have true forgiveness in the marriage. Some people just can’t make it while others ride it through. I think it depends on your faith and your love for one another. Saddens me to say but even people who love their spouse make mistakes. I have never cheated but I have seen it many times. Cheating on a regular basis should not be tolerated but in an instance people fall short and if we want perfect we need not look any further as it does not exist.
NEVER forgiven — once a cheater, always a cheater — it does not matter what the spouse says or does — they continue on with the behavior until the innocent party leaves them behind forever — then take it onto their next target (victim).
It can take months or years to forgive your spouse. Not only will you have to forgive your spouse, they will have a lot of work to do in order to gain your trust again. That means spending more time at home to show that he isn’t spending time with someone else and focus on your relationship. Marriage counsling would provide a neutral medium and can help speed the healing process if you’re up to it. Keep an open mind and open heart. It is a terrible thing you are going through and it is great that you are willing to work through it with your spouse, they are very lucky to have you so devouted to your union after they had delt it such a blow. Good luck and give it all the time it needs.
One NEVER fully forgives .
You will pay for that indiscretion for the rest of your life .
I was cheated on thirty years ago by an old flame and I never forgave her nor will I.
People cheat on a marriage for several reason’s
Ask yourself why they are doing it. was they missing something you will not provide that they was looking for. Sometimes a couple is very affectionate an heavy with passion an after sometime the passion an affections leave, so the mate goes looking for it!
In my personal opinion women use sex to lure the man in, then when married they use sex as a behavior modification tool than a love for him. Know wonder that he might consider cheating.
Is your wife sorry and do you believe that she is sorry for what she did? Do you believe that she WON’T do it again? but past all that you have to forgive her for yourself…………and it takes as long as it takes….. could be sooner if your wife shows remorse and she is not trying to rush you to get on with the relationship –i recommend a separations to get yourself together and figure out what is best for you and your family.
A minute to forgive……. A LIFETIME TO FORGET!
First, it depends on how much willing you are to forgive, how generous you are as a person. Second, it depends on whether you are still together and the cheating continues or whether you’ve moved on to live your own separate lives. Third, it depends on how deep the wound inflicted is. The deeper it is, the longer it will take to heal – and this will affect your capacity to forgive. Fourth, it depends on whether you are trying ways to actively heal yourself and come to terms with the experience, meaning, therapy.
I say this because I got cheated and, I discovered it too late. The wife (then) refused to give it up. I spent months trying to salvage the marriage, then finally decided it was hopeless, then focused on healing myself (the depression is something, man!). When finally I recovered enough self-esteem to like myself again, I focused on the forgiveness.
She ended up marrying the guy. Then, after 7 long years, I finally found the inner strength to actually take the first move to befriend and forgive them. It took 7 years for me to gather enough inner strength to withstand the pain (whatever was left of it), the “insult” (as others would like to view it), and the seeming distaste of the whole thing – not easy to reach out to one who has betrayed you. Faith (and religion) helped. Christ died mainly because of betrayal – by Judas, by Peter (to some extent – remember the denial?), by the people (“Hallelujah” now, “Crucify Him!” next). It helped to realize that I was not alone. It helped to know that the desire, and the effort, to forgive, is noble.
Now we’re friends. Best benefit? The kids (who are with her, and who also suffered through it all) are much better and more loving, and more emotionally stable.
I think it is possible until all the love and hate you have for them is gone, and you feel nothing for them. Like if there were strangers and I think probably all the memories you have of them are blocked out of your mind. Until then I don’t think you could ever forgive them.
Being cheated on feels like the end of the world…I mean it hurts really bad especially if you truly Love this person so it may be possible to forgive but its always there in our minds and hearts. My personal saying is..”Love,Hate,Happiness and Pain its all the Same!” Because once you’ve been cheated on you have Trust issues for a lifetime. but this is only my personal opinion.
Until he or she is dead.
if he cheating again and again, i think u no need forgive he a long life.